Happy Ending

Once upon a time, I accidentally bought some "holiday" plastic wrap, as they call it. You know -- to celebrate Christmas by making all your foods look grayish-green. Appetizing! Appalled by the way it cast this hideous green sheen on all the foods it covered, I used it as little as possible. I even hid it in the back of the cabinet for months. By "month" I mean at least one year. Maybe two. Maybe more, but let's not talk about that, okay? I bought new clear plastic wrap, used it, ran out, and bought some more. One day, I came across the green nightmare in the cabinet and decided that it was wrong on so many levels to just throw it away. So I started using it. I vowed to not buy any other plastic wrap until the green was gone. Suddenly, I found myself not needing plastic wrap as often. I found all sorts of other solutions, all sorts of substitutes for plastic wrap. Only when I had to use plastic wrap did I use the green kind. I covered pie crusts and pizza doughs, and they all looked so sad and wan underneath the mocking green plastic. Then, one day very, very recently, it was gone. Gone! And then I did a dance of joy and delight as I zipped off the serrated metal cutting strip and tossed the box and tube into the recycling bin. I even buried it in the bin so I wouldn't have to look at it. And then all my pain was gone.

The end.